Programming with a side of anxiety. How do you get to the chair.

Question

So I've been dealing a severe anxiety disorder since last year. A lot of times I just don't have the energy to get up to start working on code. Once I do have the energy, I can get up and work on coding for 5-6 hours (including time spent trying to find that lame semicolon you forgot that messed everything up). For anyone on here that suffers from anxiety or depression, how do you will yourself to go to your desk and start coding?

Answer 1

Hi mate, first, I'm glad you reached out this way, it's better to share than to keep things to yourself. I think you need to remind yourself of the motivation that set you on fire (that you can code for hours) when you feel like there's no energy, I know depression can bring you down, I was suffering from panic attacks several years ago.

Look mate, you need to tell yourself that you are good, because you are, and to convince your heart and brain you need to do good things too, and it doesn't need to be all that grand, glamorous either, simple little things that comes useful for someone or something is good enough, it will ease the pressure on yourself to know that you're good.

Try and learn to forgive yourself from not being, or becoming your dream, and forget the wrong you made, stop hating yourself from your mistakes, self hatred is stronger and more destructive than others' hatred, beware of it.

Don't forget that there's a power which has control over everything, don't forget to pray, learn and try to trust your life to God, we're only humans, we make mistakes, we screwed up, learn to accept that as a fact, the sooner we realize it the sooner we feel better. I honestly confess that I'm still learning all that I wrote here, but so far I haven't had a relapse for one year and a half, I hope it will last :)

Cheers mate!

Answer 2

@Aaron... I'm not sure if my story applies to you. Hope it helps in some way. I'm 42 years old and have struggled with my anxiety disorder since 13 years old or so. I didn't realize they were anxiety attacks per se until I was in college.

What I've come to learn, in my case, was my brain would release chemicals at random times that would normally be released to invoke sadness. Sometimes it was mild and other times it could be intense. Attacks could last from an hour to a full day.

Since my issue was due to a chemical release, I had to wait it out for the effects of the anxiety to wear off. For me, it has never been possible to suppress my anxiety with happy thoughts. I've explained it to people using alcohol as an example. The effects of being intoxicated cannot be suppressed with thoughts or will power. It has to get metabolized and finish running its course.

Understanding this similarity has helped me to identify the earliest onset of an attack, predict the intensity, and allow myself to prepare for it. By being aware, I prevent myself from mentally latching onto some invalid reason for being sad. That usually prolongs the anxiety. I used to think people were judging me or I was a failure in an attempt to rationalize my depression. That was before I understood the real issue with it being a random release of chemicals in the brain.

I also tell people around me I'm about to have an attack, in case I seem off. Announcing this has helped me cope as well. Ultimately, I let myself realize I'm only feeling sad from a chemical release which will wear off soon. This really helps me compartmentalize the physical reaction a bit and get on with what I need to do.

Before I realize it, the anxiety is gone and I'm back to normal. It's much like hiccups in that the more I think about it, the worse it gets. However, it eventually goes away when you aren't thinking about it.

Answer 3

Wow thanks guys. Yes mine is caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain. So I end up mentally arguing with my self about what's right and wrong. I've found what helps me is meditation then I wright down what happened, how bad was it, what I should have thought etc.

Answer 4

@Aaron yeah, meditation is also a way for relaxation, if it helps you, please keep it up! :)

Answer 5

I hope this <Yin>`s code can help you
https://code.sololearn.com/c60e7ls2WPTo/?ref=app

Answer 6

@Aaron... It's good for me to meet others online with the same challenge. I've only met a couple other people who struggle with anxiety disorder like this. Fortunately, my family is so supportive.

Answer 7

Brother, you are not alone. I suffer with depression every fu*king day! And many months I miss my lessons to learn on solo learn. It's hard man.

Answer 8

One of the best method is, find someone with same interest and problems. And share your feelings. And move forward together.
Why don't we be friends ?
I also am suffering from depression and also trying to learn programming.

Answer 9

pro gyi